To Speak or Not to Speak – This is the Foundation of Effective Coaching
Coaching isn’t just about what you say—it’s about when you choose not to say anything at all. The best coaches understand that sometimes, the greatest impact comes from stepping back, observing, and letting the moment unfold.
It’s a bit like being a Montessori teacher. In the Montessori classroom, the teacher doesn’t constantly hover or direct. Instead, they create an environment where children can explore and learn at their own pace. The teacher steps in only when necessary—to guide, redirect, or provide the right tool at the right time.
Imagine watching someone move through an exercise with ease. Their form is smooth, controlled, and efficient—like a child focused on completing a puzzle, deeply engaged in the task at hand. In these moments, your job isn’t to interfere. It’s to observe, offer subtle encouragement if needed, and let them continue.
Recognizing When to Intervene
But what happens when the movement isn’t so smooth? Picture someone struggling to string together the right steps in a dance, unsure how to match their movements to the rhythm. That’s when coaching becomes essential. The key is stepping in with just the right touch—not so much that you take over or overwhlem, but enough to help them back on track.
Evaluating Movement Challenges
When movement stumbles, ask yourself:
- Does the person need a different setup? Sometimes adjusting the tools or environment—like switching from standing to kneeling—can make all the difference.
- Is this movement right for them today? Some exercises might feel empowering on one day but overwhelming the next.
- Would another exercise achieve the same goal more effectively? There’s always another way to meet the objective.
Managing Mental Overwhelm
A pianist overthinks a piece they’ve played for years, and suddenly, every note feels off. Or a child, hyper-aware of being watched, starts second-guessing themselves and loses the flow of their activity. This happens when there is overwhelm, trying to process too many things.
Using Effective Movement Cues
Movement should feel natural, not forced. A simple but powerful cue that allows the body to organize itself to accomplish the task. One thing at a time.
- “Push the floor away.”
- “Keep your hips moving like an elevator.”
- “Feel the pressure in your feet and press into that pressure.”
The Strategic Use of Silence
Silence is one of the most underrated tools in coaching. When used well, it creates space for learning, exploration, and self-discovery.
Think of a gardener tending to plants. The gardener doesn’t pull the leaves apart to make them grow faster. Instead, they create the right conditions—enough water, sunlight, and support—then step back and let nature take its course.
The Bottom Line
Coaching isn’t about showing off how much you know. It’s about helping people feel better, move better, and live better. That means knowing when to step in and when to step back.
Because at the end of the day, coaching isn’t about the coach—it’s about the people we help. And sometimes, the most helpful thing you can do is let them shine.